Karoline Leavitt Says She’ll Still Defend Pedophiles on Pro Bono Basis After Exiting White House | The Hard Times

Press Secretary Karoline Leavitt is reportedly leaving the White House but reassures the public she'll keep defending wealthy abusers on a volunteer basis, because some callings are too sacred to abandon. The piece closes with a chef's-kiss cameo from Jared Leto and Russell Brand, which does more heavy lifting than most of the body text.