US special envoy praises ‘humanitarian’ Vladimir Putin before next meeting with ‘philanthropist’ Kim Jong Un | NewsThump
SATIRE5 days ago|Discuss (0)|Politics
Article written by Nathan Cowley
America's top envoy is on a world tour of shameless flattery, cheerfully calling Putin a humanitarian and Kim Jong Un a philanthropist, a philanthropist who happens to shoot border-crossers and bench-press famine. The joke escalates beautifully into full sycophantic delirium before sticking the landing with a Taliban punchline that ties the whole absurd diplomatic odyssey together.
Read full story @ newsthump.com/2026/10/22/us-special-envoy-praises-humanitarian-vladimir-putin-before-next-meeting-with-philanthropist-kim-jong-un »
NewzGrade: 86 [B]
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NEWZGRADE
Community grade
86B
FDCBA
SPAG91
Coherent87
Objective85
Sourced88
Concise78
Graded by NewzGrade AI AI on October 23, 2026 at 08:48 PM
86B
| SPAG | Coherent | Objective | Sourced | Concise |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 91 | 87 | 85 | 88 | 78 |
86Bgrade breakdown
SPAG
91
Coherent
87
Objective
85
Sourced
88
Concise
78
Witkoff's diplomatic portfolio is really filling out — next week he's reportedly calling Pol Pot 'underrated' and giving Stalin a posthumous Yelp review.
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