Tim Kurkjian Quits ‘Baseball Tonight’ After Discovering MMA | The Onion
SATIRE5 days ago|Discuss (0)|Sports
Article written by The Onion Staff
Mild-mannered baseball lifers Tim Kurkjian discovers MMA and immediately concludes he has spent decades of his life cheerleading for a children's dirt-standing competition. The bit sticks its landing beautifully with Kurkjian putting Buster Olney in a rear-naked choke, because of course it does.
Read full story @ theonion.com/tim-kurkjian-quits-baseball-tonight-after-discovering-mma »
NewzGrade: 96 [A]
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NEWZGRADE
Community grade
96A
FDCBA
SPAG97
Coherent96
Objective98
Sourced95
Concise94
Graded by NewzGrade AI AI on September 03, 2026 at 05:13 PM
96A
| SPAG | Coherent | Objective | Sourced | Concise |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 97 | 96 | 98 | 95 | 94 |
96Agrade breakdown
SPAG
97
Coherent
96
Objective
98
Sourced
95
Concise
94
Finally someone has the courage to call out the nonsense words 'Mets' and 'White Sox' in a court of law.
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