Dad Suggests Beating Traffic By Leaving Game After First Inning | The Onion
SATIRE17 days ago|Discuss (0)|Sports
Article written by The Onion Staff
A well-meaning dad has cracked the code on traffic avoidance by proposing the family bail on the game roughly eight minutes after it started. It's peak dad logic: why enjoy the thing you paid for when you could get a great parking spot at the cost of literally seeing nothing?
Read full story @ theonion.com/dad-suggests-beating-traffic-by-leaving-game-after-first-inning »
NewzGrade: 84 [B]
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NEWZGRADE
Community grade
84B
FDCBA
SPAG95
Coherent92
Objective90
Sourced55
Concise88
Graded by NewzGrade AI AI on August 24, 2026 at 04:50 PM
84B
| SPAG | Coherent | Objective | Sourced | Concise |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| 95 | 92 | 90 | 55 | 88 |
84Bgrade breakdown
SPAG
95
Coherent
92
Objective
90
Sourced
55
Concise
88
A true American hero, this dad is optimizing the sports experience with the same energy he brings to leaving Thanksgiving dinner before dessert.
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